Myths and Realities of Interracial Relationships

This is a 5 mins video showing 2 University/College students's view on Interracial dating and how people often make assumptions about others based on their race.

Please share your thoughts:)

This is what you see when you type "Interracial couples" or "Interraical dating" in Google Search?

Hum...Let's see what happens when you type "Interracial dating","Interracial" and "Interracial Couple" in Google search....
Okay...So there's " The best and largest interraical dating site in the world", "Salt and Pepper Signles", "Interraical dating site" and so much more....

This is almost as bad as when you typed in "Asian" for Google search and tons of porn sites pops up!

Is the Media Influencing Me, or Reflecting Social Progression?

The other day when I was watching TV I noticed a new commercial for a car. In the ad a white male is driving his new car and while driving different things appear in the car with him based on his future. A dog appears in the back, and then a woman appears in the passenger seat. The woman just happens to be Asian. A baby then arrives in the back seat and the assumption is made that they are married and have kids. The message of the ad was to show that their car is something that you would have for your lifetime and can be used for everything in your life.

I did not think much of it but then the very next ad was for a bank, I believe to be HSBC. In the add a white male and an Asian female who appear to be married for some time discuss their financial situations for retirement.

The question I asked myself was is the media now telling me that it is all right for to date outside of your race and that it is acceptable? Or is it just the media is reflecting the social progression of the global village?

Further research showed me that not only is it in commercials but some of the latest TV programming and movies are showing similar views on its relationships. The movie Hitch, Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner?, and TV shows like ER, Lost, My Name is Earl, Grey's Anatomy and Will & Grace have all included interracial couples in their casting decisions.

From my point-of-view this is a reflection of how society has changed. Most of the media is targeted and 16-35 year olds, those who grew up with diversity and multiculturalism in their day-to-day routine. I actually appreciate the media’s attempt to show more and more colour-blind character roles as it helps educate the narrow minded!

The World is Shrinking! The World is Shrinking!

One of my favorite comedians, Russell Peters, once joked about the future of race in one of his stand-up skits. He stated that, “cultures are merging, and we're all going to end up, not white, black, brown, or yellow, but beige.” He further explains his theory based on two things. The biggest populations in the word are Chinese and Indian, and the more that Caucasians and other races mix with others, the odds are that it would be with of Asian descent.

Russell states that this will take about 300 years before everyone is a hybrid mixture of one of the two. Being that I am part of this mixing, it made me think more about the future of not only my family but also the future generations of my offspring. Assuming that my kids are a mix of white and Chinese, what are the chances of my children marry and have kids with Chinese or Caucasian? If they were to marry a white person that would make them ¾ white and ¼ Asian. Assuming this trend happens further down, the Asian blood would soon be lost. This does not bother me in anyway but it is interesting to see that maybe what Russell states might be true. The outcomes are enless!

Time To Stir the Pot! The Melting Pot!

Being that I live in Vancouver, I can only really talk about the things that I see around me. Vancouver is by far the biggest melting pot of all the places I have been in the world. Canada as a whole has a vast collection of different peoples. Canada has always been an inviting country for immigration; in addition to its beauty and opportunity that is why I live here.

Sometimes I ask myself the question, If I did not move to Canada, would I be interested in my boyfriend if I met him Hong Kong? That question I do not know the answer to. As with my previous posts, I mention the interracial couples that I frequently see around town. Most of them are young couples, either dating or recently married. Why is that you don’t see many elder couples that are interracial in relation to how many new couples there are. I can only see it being for one of two reasons. Firstly, a more acceptable means of love for newer generations. Secondly, more races are being introduced to each other in common places like work and school.

Personally, I never had really big problems with my family accepting my boyfriend for his skin color because he made up for it in other ways. Plus my family has been in Canada for so long that maybe they have been desensitized to it.

In contrast, my second statement I believe to more true, for the simple fact that Canada has over 200 different races living together. Where else can you get such a colorful mosaic of people in the world? With this many people intermingling together everyday, falling in love would not be a forgotten subject.

SO...what do you guys do for fun?

A lot of my Asian girl friends asked me, “So what do you guys do for fun?”

Hum…interesting question, I would probably ask the same thing. What do interracial couples do for fun? Especially for an interracial couple like me and my bf (a very Honger girl like me, or used to be… and a very Canadian guy like my boyfriend.)

Well, let’s make a list of things that I did before I met him:

Here are my everyday/weekend activities (before I met my bf):
-Sing Karaoke with my friends
-Go for bubble tea
-Watch the latest TVB Chinese Drama (TVB is the first wireless commercial television station in Hong Kong)
-Watch the latest Japanese/Korean/Taiwanese Drama, movies
-Rent Chinese movies and watch it in Chinese.
-Shopping in Richmond.
-Smoking
-Go to house parties and play drinking games. (example :15/20 drinking games, Dices games and Ma Jong)
-Play videogames
-Go to a bubble Tea store and read all their translated Japanese comics and Hong Kong gossipy magazines.
-Gossip in Cantonese and Mandarin.

Here are my summer activities (before I met bf):
-Went on a “road trips” with my friends to the USA ->Bellingham and Seattle. (That’s like really, really far, because it’s like 3 hours of non-stop driving. lol)
-BBQ near the lake/beach, things like chicken wings, fish balls and wieners with a long metal fork and campfire. (Usually takes about 20 mins to cook 1-2 chicken wings, IF you are lucky and you don’t drop it that is, hey~ it’s not about the food, its the experiences that counts!)
-Hide from the sun, don’t want get tanned, because most Honger guys prefer pale Honger girls.


Here are my everyday/weekend activities (after I met my bf):
-Watch 24, Desperate Housewives, Smallville, Entourage and other popular TV series.
-Shopping in Metrotown/Downtown
-Go to house parties. (Watch hockey games, play poker, grab a beer/cooler)
-smoking
-Go to Starbucks/ Blenz
-Read magazines like Allure, Glamour and In-Style etc
-Gossip in English.

Here are my summer activities (after I met my bf):
-Went on road trips to LA, Las Vegas and Oregon.
-BBQ in the back yard with a Grill.
-Tanning, because the magazines said so.

….
Conclusion:
I am doing pretty much the same things, there’s nothing “outta this world” or “crazy”.

Most of these changes are not too extreme and I can adapt to it, not a big deal, such as:

-Choices of drinks for parties are different. Now, both group are filled with good partiers

For Honger parties:
Red Wine mixed with 7-up
Chivers (Don’t think I spell that right) mixed with Green Tea.
Hard liquor with some sort of mixer
Coolers
Some beer (not very popular though)

Canadian parties:
90% of the alcohol beverages are Beer
The rest (left over 10%) are distributed between, coolers and wines.

-We have different party games; that’s fine, it’s not the end of the world.

-Instead of using a huge metal fork to BBQ food, we used a BBQ grill.

-The definition for “Road trip” changed, anything under 4 hours is a day trip, anything over 12-16 hrs drive is called a road trip.

-Pale skin->tanned skin

and so on.


Sometimes my boyfriend and I compromise; we will go do very Honger things one day (like having Dim sum for breakfast, watching a Chinese movie with English subtitles and go for bubble tea with our friends and sing karaoke) and then we will do something very Canadian (like having breakfast at White Spot, ATVing in Whistler, watch movies at a drive-in theater.) Yes…sometimes I do miss playing Ma Jong while munching my Calbee chips, but I think because of our differences (yes, I know it a cliché) make things so much more interesting, I swear!

Hard boiled egg

Vancouver is one of the most culturally diverse cities in the world; its inevitable that one will see many interracial couples strolling on the street. I am too, in an interracial relationship; I am Chinese and my boyfriend is Caucasian.

Normally, people won’t say too much about interracial couples if they happen to see one on the street. In most cases, people will not know them personally enough to really notice or make it their business. That is even if people make a conscious decision to notice different cultures falling in love. In Vancouver alone, you see many everywhere you go. (Its not like the 1800’s or something, where interracial couples are stoned to death.)
During the three years we’ve been together (almost four now), I’m surprised as to how some people around us have perceived us and have made some offensive comments about interracial couples.
My ignorant friends who have never been involved in an interracial relationship made most of these stupid comments. (It’s either that or their lack of understanding of other culture.)

Some of the questions they’ve asked are like,
“How is it dating a white guy?”
“What do you guys do?”
“What do you guys talk about?”
“Does he have a big penis?” (Like what the hell?)
“Are you sexually attracted to him? Is that why you like him?”
Etc, etc…

( *names have been changed)

Anyway, last Monday, I’ve met a guy called * Mike, he is a friend of *Eric (my god brother). Like every Monday lunch break, my god brother Eric and I usually have lunch together, so last Monday, Mike joined us for lunch. At first Mike seemed to be a pretty decent guy, he seemed like a pretty nice person, positive and talkative- UNTIL I mentioned that my boyfriend was white, then he started bad mouthing about interracial couples, which made me pretty angry! Mike went on and on about how he is so sick and tired of seeing interracial couples on the street, he especially hates the “white boys, Asian girls” combo. After he rampaged about how interracial couples annoy him, he still has the guts to asked me, “So why do you date a white guy? What is it about white guys that attract you? Is it because they’re more exotic?”

I was thinking to myself, “ WTF? More exotic? What the hell is this guy trying to say?”

The funny thing is most of Mike’s friends are non-Asians but mostly white. Also, Mike himself admitted that he has a thing for white girls (now that’s fetish! He likes a girl because of her race not the person). I wonder if he finds his comments contradictive to his believes.


First of all, I am not going out with an alien okay? White people are just like any other human beings. We might look different, we might eat different food, we might speak different languages…but its not like he is a completely different species.

I like him because of who he is, not because of his skin color, or his penis or that he has blue eyes or because he is a Canadian citizen (I am too a Canadian Citizen, not like I to get with a white boy to get a Canadian citizenship). It’s just like going out with an Asian guy, but he doesn’t speak my language, that’s all! There is nothing strange, mysterious, or “exotic” about dating someone of a different race as Mike puts it.